Christmassy Eve ...Eve ...

asleep during the movie ... the days not used to anymore. The shutdown of the country now apart from the skeleton function of life. 

The minds away from those left to die ... 

The spoils in the toils

now the step out into the mode in mood for the star recovery and many programmes still not come my way ... the self programme of much ...with those best who know me better ..

In time the realisation where would I be with out the extended family, the people who back you up when so lost in strife ... where those whose only reliance is strangers in good and sense of mind ... if they are bloody lucky to have the good ones .... 

What ever happens

the times change in my life by the second ... the diversions hard to resist in time zone travels inhome. 

The time I struggle, the time I am laughing, and the time to make change 

The air flows in this occasion as I prepare to take leave again 

The experience lost, now gained in more freshness with such earnest among the stress and many conflicts still to face 

Bake a Make

... Inspired by tea for three one November ... 

The fascination of eating out again. And the simplicity in tea and cake. The time once again when minded to make and bake. The adaptions in doing so for one. Always one that was in the kitchen rustling up the extra treats in Kernow. This a pasttime until .... 

I am rekindling the time. I am back with a basic kitchen. The implements built up over the years in baking, long gone. That does not stop me. I look at the world online to inspire me. And from my reestablishing in travelling a tad ... 

Inroads in the

entangled time intertwined and dispersed in parts. I only hope by the festive month a health settle that reemerged a tad lately lets me continue the road to where I aim .... 

There is much hilarity as is the expletives in the ridiculous scenarios I face daily. The remember on waking to eat and take the time to do so. The rush in the digestive system that saw much in that time. That, that others do not see. 

With video to vides calls, the seeing again is believing. The irritants of others bemuse me such. My situation can be a conversation stopper when I am in wicked mode. 

It is easy to be sarcastic, it is harder to laugh and smile. It is thanks to a smiling in law family that rubbed off on me, that I can smile now, and through this adversity it is many thanks to a devoted husband. I can continue without him aside in reality... 

The difference

in a look ...

The start at the fundamental basis of life before branching out in the wider scope of comfort in doing uncomfortable  .. the achieve in tiny parts of the core of life 

.. Experimenting in ...

... image in evolve ... 

two Cornish places one day in September... with the perpetually different in tech ...

.... This over a few weeks in the time of a death day ... a birthday ... a anniversary... a wedding anniversary ... a family reunion ... in the inner core and sanctum of the core family ... 

In the wider family another addition of yet the next generation on ... This spanning my world back into life a small piece in step... 

A little gizmo

of a mobile photo lens attachment to experiment with... it came my way via kin who tries the new tech available 

These times I tend to use what I have. The want of waste that is in normal life to the life encased behind certain doors It will be interesting to see whether I include it in this simplified life I am heading towards ...? 

The hub

of communications in change ... the transition of post crisis learnings of devices all new to me at that time. since  a sister introduced me to occupy me away from the suffering of that dismal time in limbo.

The continual keeping up to speed or not. on change and the advancement in the tech available to us 

the sense of humour

in life style alter 

a card from a summer birthday .... 

... from a sister to a sister 

our in jokes ...

 ... from a early summer of many miles walked together in the countryside of Cornwall.

The style in theme

...a continuation of a bank holiday weekend last into this ... the slow snail pace in removal, the philosophy of now, what I do not use in different ways of how it makes one feels.The constraints in all those sayings ring true. 

I have cleared a path through the invisible to anyone but me 

The rest in plenty ... a forthcoming trip for more medical assistance 

The hope I make it through to Monday ... 

In the meantime in occupy of flinging in the bin, recycle or charity trolley... 

It is an almighty task ... the space so squeezed from that valentine day in ruthless clear. 

The pull out of much in the batter of life left ... And getting to reach in where time was left standing 

It is eerie ... 

... One is constantly catapulted back in time ...  

The style in text, type, rules, regs, bags, products, fashions, toys, is not even the start 

This the fascination too in this, of those that did assist ... 

A museum of time ... 

The ambiance

created this bank holiday internally, in all aspects to pave the readiness for the next batch of removal of what some misconstrue... I find it all unnecessary. I became in that cycle of ...is it with the bother? 

Crewe 2016 

to some better times again ... The memories in movies created, the images captured some precious times. I think one would find it hard to put these photos into a category. They span across all elements. A photo journal of much. 

In seasons or so

the further of flesh to see the light of day again ... the style in dress and colour in my design once again... ? The dresses once worn. The sport shorts to cycle. The swimwear to go further than a paddle or dip ... And the attire for the right style in day.

The surroundings more of my design in flair. 

The increase in studies and volunteer to find my forte in a vocation ...

But first ... enjoy the bloom of a semblance of my life style in the remove of tatters ... final ... 

August 19, 2016 

Embark in due back

from the trepidation of the journey now taken ... I did ... I done ... a time now to see those ideas elsewhere that popped in the mind can come to fruition ... The furniture ... the kitchen ... the bedroom ... the functions ... the requirement in need ... the type of move in home ... the wait or who you know offers ... the create in design of new ideas in vocational aspirations 

But first the wind down ... the travel ... the adjustment in aligning with life back in my space ... 

for family of mine ...

A summer romance in an area I now know much better 

Trepidation in Trip

around the plans in making ... The wonder past in the now happening of the next generation ... and as anticipated the spontaneous gestures we do. A look see in a bit of a house sit, while they are off to a nearby country. 

All these weeks in change, we are now living ... 

A walk in all

environment and time 

A look see, for ingredients tonight, to use up what I selected for recipes to entice the sensation of texture in taste again. That we take for granted. Those dark days of cold to a vibrancy enveloping me once again ... inthe aisles of a big place still .. with the awful intercom announcements 

Lost in lost ...

... The theme of the time ... 

Ancient in old in new ... The fathom of my collection of recipes ... I have been surfing the net for recipes ... until the influx of moving items round in spasms at home dispersal brings to light the reminders of favourites ... the family recipes not found elsewhere ... 

I have for a while been struggling with some old time favourites you get to know off by heart ... the time missed in doing so, is a fog in the mind through the seep of time lost in elsewhere ...

The struggle between some dessert recipes, three in mind and one a cross between a cheesecake and key lime ... 

For now the attempt in a vanilla cheesecake ... the most delicious one of those, I had at an hotel in Gloucester one time ... a taste where words are inexplicable ... The divinest of texture with taste.  A memory shared. 

One of many fond memories in special times with a deceased Papa, recounted to a daughter who remembers many of those experiences in time, long before she was to come into our lives ...

Intriguing

in this while ... 

the underpin in personality, in service to this, the wider community, the churches 

Thyself unto others throughout this life ...the little time out with adversity ...

...the stepping stones in life loss and back ... 

The now dated eight point Guiding, guide in enrolling in this movement. The interests the Internet opens up in sharing, what indeed has moved with the times. I missed out on reunions of many. This journey was to take me into the still murky times of mental health with physical needs in a dire complex way ... Again there is no wallow in this. I was to become who I am today. I have been enriched with the unimaginable experience. 

The change face of a city

area and a few towns I have lived in ...

A Kent Town ... 

The local post office moving recently, since it was built in 1964 I believe. The span of time on from my deceased in laws in how much has changed already in a quarter of a year. The demolition at the end of the road into a pile of rumble of the Citizens Advice bureau and The Working Men's club abandoned buildings. Unlike some towns, these were for not long ...

This new refurbishment of a town in the knowledge of this much anticipated change in landscape from last year in conversation of progression of this town. The fascinating insight, of the greed of developing with not taking account of Eco and infrastructure... while waiting to see the MP ... 

The office environment

this for some who love the outdoors is an unbelievable think 

Instead of those city inspired ... tallest buildings 

It would be good, so good in fact to work, in an eco building with the out in 

Productivity would be unimaginatively progressive for all ...  

The task time forgot

in the sweep of life ... brings an enrichment in itself ...not without quirks and quandaries ... 

Thy milestones many

Rooting in the past 

from my guiding days

still not sure where the others are yet ?

Those uniforms and badges

We have in some form or other from opportunities given

Local and afar

afar and local 

A Splitter Splatter Saturday Scatter amid June 2016 

Trekking the roads, lanes, trails, woods, forests, parks and history. A lot of both the paternal line of my family and my in laws. The weaving in and out of Greater and Central London where I lived and worked ... for a tad too. And eventually a family I was connected to and friends in Hither Green, Chelsea, Mottingham and areas I am still figuring out. The hospitals where people worked. The inside view of life in a hospital from a Professors view. Travelling on Concorde to conventions or whatever they are called. The murky mind revealing itself., of memories rusty in adversity times. 

And catching up with a late fathers in law cousin ... whom we visited recently. Who recounted walking straight in her locality to Plumstead before it was built up. This area well accquanted in my well husbands days. The football team supported with long standing family membership. The local Salvation Army too of a family line there. In and around the history once again of the paternal, parternal line. the family home eventually moving to Bexleyheath from the area. 

A wide spread acquisition of time in a city with various friends, and family and colleagues. A treat from an American or few of a medieval banquet, I think was in the East End. Another friend up the north of London. Some have now passed away. Or we are slowly getting reacquainted with. This life that is sometimes busy for others beyond ... 

The 70s and 80s revisited ...

in the backwards, going forwards ... life in the decades ... how it was portrayed by a younger generation during time in London 2012 cultural Olympiad at the Museum of the Home in our daughters generation in time there ...

Time revisited in life here, in the decades, before we have that technology now in these times, often taken for granted. Time revisited in life, via the legacy within the archives virtual, more recent.

My pen pals from time in the letter writing of past ... The learning of native Norwegian not in a classroom, from life of interest .... has always compelled me ...

Letters to Emails 

The end view

of a hike and a picnic in a County once more 

A long slog up to an hamlet, passing the quaint in quirky, the red telephone boxes of old, a water pump, to get to the wooded entrance for another foxy Friday, in a forest. The so familiar route walked in time past with those now gone. A picnic by a stream of a river in a quiet interlude. The fact I carried this food for half the trek before the load became lighter. A feat on top of many feats this trip in a time determined. 

A surge in much

these days in the month now past ... thyself, the home, the thanks to those who gave time steadfastly and with quiet dignity. It was not easy in the hard. The new grief of new loss. The new beginnings of change up North. The homes I resided. The miles travelled .... 

The grunts and grunts in removal of the bad for better. 

Thy in a burst forth ...

into the next phase,
past through the haze,
of bitter in fears,
the sun through the tears.
let's hope this fortuitous stream,
is here in reams.

Off the grid ...

... I have only just come on it ... 

Today is the start of a week of the next phase of change ... remembering if I can do a year of logs ... I can do the same in restoring the life in life ... 

Although the last time I went away with plans on return ... Life took a different turn ... We see what happens this time around ... 

In time it will be what I would like it to be.. And try to enjoy it as it happens to get there ... 

Contempt into the flow ...

of living seeping out of a burden of time ...

This is still not understood until my recanting of life and finally through channels I have a long overdue diagnosis ... 

I had been to the void of precipice and back yet again ... but there ... we are never taken seriously ... 

Of life in things to come

After yet another raucous week of cacklin' and cursin'

Thoughts reminding me not to get carried way in these things past. The soon to be events of the future to come upon me

I am actually more keen to fathom out the next stage to organise in the home, despite what anger I might come upon in doing so, tomorrow.

It will mean another area of space being revealed again ...
 And more whoops of joy from us both left behind, from that day ...

House keeping in altar and change ...

for an impending Silver day and beyond 

We had to still to revisit our honeymoon destination

I will probably go to one of our todo places as a first port of call

The long road to housekeep all areas of life 

to live in the meantime and now 

Tis a challenge 

A Spring in Difference ... of the usual ...

... Natures babies ... Bluebells ... Primroses ... Daffodils ... Fields of butter cups ... The start of the  freshly cut grass in gardens and parklands ...

The scattering of daisies yet again which inspired a poem last year ... 

En route to Eltham through our villages on the bus 

And this particular Spring ... catching up with my widening social media in the first interest post crisis in doing so. The chance again to see some amazing things shared. The obscure ... The well liked .. The favourites ... The viral ... In a different style to last time in life ... 

eBay Etsy and more,

Back in the noughts 

the last decade, before

the waste in decay,

thoughts return,

 but hey,

I have changed

beyond the time,

where those moments,

 now will be, 

we shall see?

retrieved some useful items ...

within the home this week ...

And what a week  ... 

At the start of this very week a Wife, a Mum whose funeral took place ... at the end of the same week the anniversary ...  

... of the the loss of her husband ... 15 years ago ... at midnight on Census day that year ... 

one month on from our recent loss ... 

And all that happened in the following days in reclaiming back some more space within this home from a muddle of life in death ... and death in life ... 

More Fatewells said ...

Onto the task in hand  of  change ... from clutter back to space about

to the life of talk to writing to action in action ... 

A Life Is emerging ...

From the muddle of a home ...

I am taking off ... I hope for a more even keel ... Which will be difficult in th forthcoming time of saying goodbye to my deceased husband Mum ... The last conversation, the last cheeky moment, the last photo...  all just prior to the suddenness of her death ... 

Three Weeks

... have now passed

The first day into the first Week

Ticks in time of a new mourning, soon to pass again in weeks months years since ... if it is not our turn ... 

The funeral now coming together with just the tweaks to finalise ...

My thoughts turning to preparations for the peace being disturbed ... I am accustomed to my own life and it is more noticeable now when I am with others ...

And then finally we get to the actual celebration of life at a service of a lifetime from birth to death with a particular loyal faith ... 

Victorian Style ...

... with a twist of the 21st in a chapel of Rest ...

And paying for the privilege of sitting with your loved ones to say goodbye ... Unless you are a funeral director yourself ...

I nearly asked if anything was display models to use for hubby last time I was here ...

Where once it would be at home and a more basic style for some ...
It can now be eco again ... as basic or as lavish as you wish ... All at a cost

Another car change

For a member of the family 

We were supposed to go to Falmouth when last in Kernow for sister to have s look.

Plans changed on that morning we were due to take a car journey down into Cornwall ... when my mum in law passed away 

Finally she went today .. she will pick up her change of car on Saturday ... 

Now for the fun of getting in the back of that one !

I was pleased ...

Red Arrows 

indeed to come across a lot of photos past in a format easy to modernise ... A lot so far from 2004 and 2005

For everything muddled, lost or ... deliberately destroyed as a punishment to my husband as they could not touch him at home ... in destroying all items stored elsewhere ... 

This is good ... to see our life again ... 

It is also assisting memory gaps

A death or few ... What would have been ...

and what is now ... 

A funeral in the planning ... More deceased belongings and photos many again ... Alongside with the changing times which is the more positive side of too much in belongings ... 

After all the unnecessary belongings ... one starts coming across treasures thought lost for ever ... 

The salvage of two homes and the eventual one room of the more recent passing of a family member brings treasures going back and spanning three centuries worth of life from generation through generation ... 

A very sad but very fascinating time indeed ... 

And catching up from a time of all at once clearing two homes sorting a life back into structure and routine and being by the side of my late father in catch up time after seasons lost ... All at once and same ...

And that is after a time with my late husband away from life for time lost in time ... 

Finally ... on the latest passing I'm able to gather myself a bit better ... even though still in some muddles from these seasons in time ... 

And this with what should have been in the month of May ... a silver wedding anniversary plans that are no longer able to do as originally forseen  ... Another first without my late spouse ...